a sad week [II] ...

my dear blog;

it's a sad sad sad week for me... like a seriously sad... the kinda sad that i couldn't explain in words... the inner feeling that i can't show with my face expression... the feel is so damn deep... that i couldn't reach to cure it... what am i doing all this while... i put myself to a place that i should not be... i hope this gonna be gone soon... as faster as the wind blow... without me notice that it's over, full stop, a dot... all i need to know, when i wake up, i already at the different world with a different new life...

+ i'm at the freeway now... it's up to me to turn to which exit... +

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a sad week...

my dear blog;

it's a sad week to me...

semoga roh wan (nenek) berada di tempat org2 yg beriman... *amin*...


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the ugly truth is

my dear blog;

i was born to be a savior and my middle name is

+ s a c r i f i c e +

A sacrifice you make today
Will never ever be gone
A sacrifice you make today
Will soon be passed on

A sacrifice you make today
Will stay in many hearts
A sacrifice you make today
Help many play their parts

A sacrifice you make today
Will never be forgotten
A sacrifice you make today
Will never be mistaken

A sacrifice you make today
May even change history
A sacrifice you make today
May be kept in someone’s memory

A sacrifice you make today
Might light someone’s day up
A sacrifice you make today
Might fill someone’s dry cup

A sacrifice you make today
Will always be treasured
A sacrifice you make today
Will always be remembered

note: poem via Anders Lim

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mumbling the mumble...

my dear blog;

kerja...

semakin strict, semakin stress... setitik silap pon takbleh nak kompromi... hari hari balik rasa risau, kalau kalau esok ada silap yang dijumpa... sejak dua menjak rasa mcm hati tak tenang, kenapa eh?... kerja kah?... entah la...

high expectation...
aku pada diri sendiri, takut tak tercapai jek... nanti mesti sedih...

a good listener...
that's what i need now... are you?

:(


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a reminder for you...

my dear blog;

+ saya mau ini untuk ulang tahun saya yang bakal tiba +

"please... please... pleasssseeeee..." hahahahha!

note:lagu nih dah berada dlm kepala sejak beberapa minggu yang lalu... adehh!



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i was born to be a miss take...

my dear blog;

+ the sky belongs to the stars +

note: picture via LoMo

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bila dah mula bercakap dengan dinding....

my dear blog;

agak stress dengan kerja... kalau dulu ada je biro pengaduan yang setia dengar rungutan rungutan aku... cakap la pasal apa, dia akan dengar, response lepas tuh buat lawak sengal... walaupun aku call lewat malam, tapi itu dulu, beberapa tahun dulu, jadi tak perlula ungkit citer dulu... gile tak best...

seriously, dua tiga menjak ni aku rasa mcm tak larat... tgk surat2 komitmen minta di totalkan jumlah angka angka... itu tak kira yg bakal di tambah untuk tahun depan... haish... aku pernah berbual pasal tujuan berkerja dengan a friend of mine... kita kerja untuk bayar komitmen, kita kerja utk kurangkan jumlah angka yang kita perlu hadap setiap bulan... sampai bila?... puaskah dengan kerja kita sekarang? tentula tak puas... manusia itukan dilahirkan dengan rasa yang tak pernah puas... lepas satu satu yang di mahu... tapi seriously aku pernah terfikir utk migrate... cuma tak cukup guts aja... dulu, 2 tahun dulu hampir dapat, interview sampai 5 level, sampai ke level 5, entah mana silapnya kompeni tuh senyap jek... kalau tak dah di UK aku... mungkin aku buat tak sepenuh hati sebb fikirkan pasal org lain... haish... dah! jgn nak salahkan org...

2010? sudah dilevel manakah aku?... kerja? life? aku rasa dah sampai masa untuk rangka strategi baru... kena rombak semua benda... dah la baik tido melalut sampai ke pagi pon tak guna... esok ada 2 extraction, tak tau mcmana nak layan dengan system yang slow mcm siput, opis jek baru kaler purple bagai... tapi... haishhhhh... esok kena semangat berlebihan... bak kata biro pengaduan aku dulu "hadapi dengan senyuman"... aku tau, cliche kan? bosan...


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between those lines...

my dear blog;

i’ve been nice these days… not taking seriously about everything that i saw and knew… so i choose to keep it to myself and give you time to open your mouth and tell me what had happen actually or what’s happening now… because i know making assumption is not good at all… and i want to hear it from you, yourself… not from other people and not from that bloody world wide web…

one day we need to have a serious talk about this… until now, neither me nor you, know what we are doing right now…

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if i just have another 1 day...

my dear blog;

(500) days of summer... i'm so in LURVE with that movie... and i have my own reason for that... other than that, the soundtrack... yang rata rata berlatar belakang kan the smiths... sangat lazat... sedang sibuk dengan kerja yang memenatkan... tiada masa nak browse for the full track of the soundtrack... ada yang sudah ketemu? share la link...

"do you like me? like me as friend? just friend? i like you, and i would like to be your friend..." - (500) days of summer

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the dilemma of being repulsed...

my dear blog;



everhear the expression "damned if you do, damned if you dont?" ... it's the dilemma of being repulsed by something and attracted to it at the same time... like with coffee... people drink it for the taste, the buzz, the sensation of holding a warm mug in their chubby little hands, or even because sipping the stuff makes them feel intellectual... some people can't even begin their days without it... but there's the downside... caffein headaches when they don't get enough, yellowed teeth if they drink to much... it's a turn-on and an aggraution all at once... sort of the things that we know if we keep on doing it over and over again, it will cause you trouble... but deep inside you are in denial... and you know u will get hurt one day... and you keep repeating the same mistakes again... and because i have this stupid dumb ass brain... and i'm not smart enough to think or maybe... maybe i refuse to think... i keep on drinking 'caffein'...

yup!... guys, 'caffein' is not good for your health...

trust me!



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honey in the sun ...

my dear blog;

:)



camera obscura
honey in the sun...


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freaking climax!!!

my dear blog;

"ever changing, growing, and searching
through stretches of time beyond life and death
this is the journey that every soul makers,
my journey always brings me to
the place between wake and sleep,
a landscape of memories,
where you and i meet again and again,
even in the darkest night, in the heaviest storm,
i always find my way back to you,
when you remember, please come back to the place we both know..."

the battle to heaven
mono

mono is coming back to town... yup! live in KL next year... i just can't WAIT!!!

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erk!

My dear blog;

baru aku prasan, aku update blog hari hari...

wahhmuhahahhahahhaha!!! gila drama!!!



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redemption song...

my dear blog;

kalau aku diberi pilihan, aku memilih utk ada time machine so that aku boleh putar masa untuk tidak make a move seperti mana yang telah aku buat dulu... tapi itu sangat cliche lah!... a fren of mine kata, benda benda tu semua is part of learning curve untuk hidup kita to become a better person... tapi aku cakap kat dia, mcm dah byk learning curve yang aku lalu... nak jugak aku rehat kejap utk graduate from those sickening learning curve tu... dia jeling aku, aku tau dia tak suka...

recently, aku selalu rujuk chapter chapter learning curve hidup aku pada dia... dia dengar, angguk, diam, response... jarang aku dengar reponse dia sebab aku mmg dilahirkan 'sedikit' degil... tapi kali ni aku mcm sedikit setuju... walaupun a fren of mine cakap aku kena setuju semua apa yang dia kata...

aku dah bosan dengan semua benda benda kat sekeliling aku sekarang... benda yang sama berulang ulang... dah pergi, datang balik... dah datang, pergi balik... it's like a never ending story... a fren of mine cakap hati aku kaler pink!... hahah... dia kata aku baik sangat, cepat forgive and forget... aku diam... tapi aku tak cakap sebenarnya kaler hati aku bukan pink... it's just aku percaya yang... satu hari aku akan dapat redemption utk semua kebajikan kebajikan percuma yang aku buat pada dia, dia dan dia...

aku pandang muka a fren of mine, aku cakap perlahan "takpelah... one day, i believe one fine day... aku akan dapat redemption yang aku tunggu tunggu... tuhan akan turun kan dia dari langit... untuk aku..."


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tidak sihat...

my dear blog;

masih demam . otak penat . need vacation

{ruang makin sempit dan aku perlu space}


i need a break!



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it's about time! and i mean NOW!

my dear blog;

sempit . sesak . senak {itu yang hati aku rasa sekarang}

a friend of mine beritahu aku yang aku perlu hentikan apa yang aku sedang buat sekarang... kalau dulu aku degil dan aku yakin aku mampu merubah keadaan... tapi jelas kalau berusaha seorang saja takan menjadi...

jelas jelas depan mata je, tapi aku tak nampak atau buat buat tak nampak... jadi aku rasa usaha sia sia aku nih aku harus hentikan, tarik handbreak... tak payah nak toleh toleh belakang...

a friend of mine juga kata... dengan jelas usaha aku mmg sia sia kalau terpaksa berurusan dengan orang yang takda hati... yang hanya tahu nilai kau itu ini... tapi diri sendiri?...

a friend of mine juga dah berkali kali ingatkan aku... jangan! jangan! jangan!... sudah! sudah! sudah!... dan aku rasa ini la masa nya... hentikan segala usaha menjaga hati orang yang tak tau nak appreciate kita...

yeah! it's about time...
and i guess this is the perfect time...



nota kaki : masih lagi mendengar shining light - ash tanpa henti


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shining light...

my dear blog;

how weird it is when i keep listening to Shining Light – Ash, over and over again… for 2 days without fail... only this one song in my itunes track...

herph… i guess it’s about time…


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congratulation!!!

my dear blog;

congratulation on your new born WTC 6766... *smile*


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UPDATE!

my dear blog;

18 more days to go for the FEEL GOOD show of the year!!! and the close date for NUFAN’s (No Use For A Name) pre sale tickets is just around the corner!!!… HURRY!!! get your own ticket now before it’s too late!!!… kindly call 0163955285 and the ticket price is RM65… *jeritan senada ala ala iklan KAMDAR*

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who's who?

my dear blog;

whose house, are you haunting tonight?

whose sheets you twist

whose face you kiss

oh!

whose house are you hauting tonight?

note: ok go!


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