Dinner...

My dear blog;


This was my dinner last night... an experimental kinda meal... egg + bread... the taste was not good as the presentation... the fact is I can't cook... hheheheh *post*

I'm the saint who marches in love...

My dear blog;

Nothing much happen... Went to an interview yesterday... this is the 4th time they evaluate me... insane is it?... but if they like me they will send me to UK for two months trainning... awsome!!!... wish me luck...

Digging my old picture folder and I found this... do some editing and here goes the result... not very nicely done... but I like it... taken from Nokia6230 phone (an outdated phone) ... and I call this piece of 'art' as Lonesome ... enjoy! *post*

Interview...

My dear blog;


"Tell me about yourself".... What a lame question... *post*

Ops! I did it again...

My dear blog;

Ok, I change the layout again... not because I have plenty of free time.. It's because I have lots of work and I really don't have mood to settle all of them... so, what do you think?... I'll change a bit later... heheheh... [busy mode on] *post*

Movie... Movie... Movie...

My dear blog;

March is the busiest month for me… *post*

Whatever!...

My dear blog;

I’m tired to pretend that it is ok to me to whatever that you’ve done… It’s hard to make other people to satisfy with us no matter how hard we’ve tried… so I don’t give a shit anymore… you can make assumption to whatever that you had in your mind… even though I know it’s not fair to me… sorry if I’m not meet the quality that you’ve set … because I’m just a human being… but I’m ok to say sorry and how about you?... it’s ok because you a human being too… but ask first before making any assumption… and thanks for the ‘label’ that you gave to me… and I forgive you… as usual… *post*

Turistas: Holiday Of Horror...

My dear blog;

Yup!... We going to watch this tomorrow night... *post*

What a 'lovely' evening...

My dear blog;

This conversation still roaming in my head and because of that I feel quilty to eat more than two times a day... here goes the story:

One 'lovely' evening... we just had shushi and we walked to the parking lot across the road...


Robet: Huh, pakcik tuh mcm nak tercabut kepala dari leher tgk sini...
Aku : Dia tgk mana?
Robet: Dia tgk awak la...
Aku : (dengan nada perasan) Herph.. tapi kan wak betul la... kenapa mcm ramai org tua yang suka ngorat saya... budak muda stylo mylo, rambut emo (fesyen rambut belah tepi habis ala ala tutup mata) takde plak nak ngorat...
Robet: Mesti lah... mesti dlm hati diorg cakap "Pergh! mantap sungguh bontot janda tuh!"
Aku : ^%#%&*(^%$@! (maki dlm hati)*ala ala mulut ternganga antara percaya dgn tak percaya*



*situasi selepas itu*
Sumpah aku takmo layan borak dengan dia selama seminggu (hanya dapat bertahan selama 10 minit) Sebab dialog ini diulang - ulang cakap:

Robet: Tak laa.... tak laaa... awak chomel mcm baby... yee awak chomelll... *sambil dia senyum kelat kelat ala ala bibir senget ke tepi - hampeh!*
*sumpah aku tau itu hanyala ayat mengambil hati semata mata dan mogok cakap aku kat dia ditambah lagi 5 minit*

Makin gemuk ke aku?... dah ala mak mak ke? Hishhhh ngeri sungguh kehidupan aku skang nih... dgn itu... dgn hati yang tekad... aku akan diet dan exercise dgn sepenuh jiwa dan raga.... *post*

A Lull In Traffic...

getClass().getName() + '@' + Integer.toHexString(hashCode())error fara[the]bugbuster
try
lowLevelOp();
catch (LowLevelException le) {error;
throw (HighLevelException)error
new HighLevelException().initCause(le); // Legacy constructor
}


System.out.println("abc");
String cde = "cde";
System.out.println("abc" + cde);error
String c = "abc".substring(2,3);eoor
String d = cde.substring(1, 2);error

My today top list...

My dear blog;

5 top list (non stop play in my head)

1. Straylight Run - Your Name Here Sunrise Highway

"Your name here...

Believe me

It's not what you'd think

Wish what you want

It's all the same to me

Well, not really

But anyway

It's just- it's nothing so simple

Nothing so silly

Nothing so mundane

Go east on Sunrise Highway
Turn left at Carmen's Avenue
Go right at the first stoplight
I'll be outside waiting for you"

2. Buelah - If We Can Land on the Moon, Surely I Can Win Your Heart

"and even though

We dont show

We cast our nets

like missionaries

If we sell out..

Oh well..

Our only fan will be changing costumes..

And you'll see its much the same

So sing a song

And for applause..

We'll get up, get up"

(after a few line of lyrics)

*I like this part*

"I've been worth a ton and I've been worth

I don't need you now'

The words you write make my heart race and start then just quit

Yeah, we'll do anything that you want

I'll fight.. if you want me to fight."

3. Azure Ray - If You Fall

"And if you fall, will you get up

Stuck in a dream, will you wake up

And if you've found love will you hold on to it

And if it's cold, will you stay warm

Drift too far, will you swim towards the shore

And if you've found love will you hold on to it"

4. Yeah Yeah Yeahs -Maps

"Wait, they don't love you like i love you

Wait, they don't love you like i love you

Ma-a-a-a-ps, wait!

They don't love you like i love you...

Made off

Don't stray

My kind's your kind

I'll stay the same

Pack up

Don't stray

Oh, say say say

Oh, say say say"

5. Cat Power - He War

"never meant to be the needle that broke your back

You were here, you were here, and you were here

Don't look back

He war he war

He will kill for you

He war he war

He will kill for you

From who you can Y

ou know you can Hey hey heeeyyy

Hey hey heeeyyy

Hey hey heeeyyy

Hey hey heeeyyy

I’m not that hot new chick

And if you won’t let me run with it

We’re on to your same old trick

Get up and run away with it "

I know these are old songs... but what the heck! hahahahha

*post*

So here's the new layout...

My dear blog;

Terasa cam hampeh bile cubicle aku jek yg nyala kat department IT nih... dari sini nampak la mamat mamat server kat dalam bilik Data Centre... herph.. nak ajak borak malas la... since I'm not a person who like to start the conversation... so... tenganga je la aku sambil monitor email yg masuk... so far takde case yang heavy so ok ok je la keje hari nih... nak buat camna.. I'm the only malay in the team... but it's ok... dapat OT... punya la bosan sampai tuka layout hahhaa... welcome to the new fara's powervision... mengong ah! *post*

Suppose to...

My dear blog;

It's suppose to be a holiday... but I'm stuck in this lame office... suck!.... *post*

'V' day?

My dear blog;

An email was sent to me from an office mate...

Dress code for 14th Feb

Blue- I'm free
Green- I'm waiting
Orange- going to propose
Pink- accepted just now!!!
Black- proposal rejected
White- already booked
Yellow- broke up!!!
Gray- not interested...
Red- leave me

and I'm wearing gray today.... hahahha!

heh!... whatever... *post*

The Queen For The Day...

My dear blog;

It's my birthday today... thanks for all the smses , and thanks my dear Lia for the sweet E-card.. heheh that lil cartoon dancing really cute... and last but not least thanks for my dearest baby... heheh for calling me more than 1 time... and baby,... that stupid question that you asked give me a clue what you will give to me as a present... hahahah..... ngongok la awak nih... and happy bithday to me... may my dreams come true... I'm the queen for the day!!! yeeehaaaa!!! *post*

Today...

My dear blog;

• It's Monday... and it's totally lame.
• My heart non stop pounding without any reason (there’s a reason actually but I pretend nothing happen)
• I yawn almost all the time and keep looking at the watch hoping now is 6pm.
• Thinking of what will happen on the coming Wednesday.
• Ergh…. My heart still pounding.
• Collect my new spectacle.
• Still, my heart pounding.
• Hoping that I’m on vacation at another country.
• Arghhhhh…. Why my heart still pounding?

*post*

My dear blog;

Pictorial updated at : http://tepakbridal.fotopages.com *post*

A song...

My dear blog;

Write me a song... and I'll tell you the secret inside me... and I'll give you the answer to the question that you ask... and I'll give you the word that you searching for... *post*

Too much...

My dear blog;

How far do you know

how much is too much?

Too much of fun?

Too much of love?

Too much to ask?

I wish I have the answer....

The Wedding...

My dear blog;

Habis satu blogspot aku round buat promotion hahhaha... sorrie guys nak carik makan... so.. any questions regarding the package, you can drop at this link http://tepakbridal.fotopages.com or straigt call to 6016 - 3955285. *post*

"Click click..."

My dear blog;

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh..." I wish I can say it out loud... Guess what? I'm still at the office... ergh... busy mode is on...

Being busy for the straight 3 weekends really make me tired... no time for movie.... no time for wearing nice clothes and roaming at the mall... all 3 straight unglamorous clothes, melting makeup and sun tan just to get nice photos for the wedding... I glad that Robert-love you baby-let me help him in taking those photos... It was fun and I enjoyed it damn much! Tepak Bridal Photography® rules!...


I wish I could find time to have a nice weekend… just on my bed… hehehe… oh yah! I got a call for an interview… herph… I don’t know weather I want to go or not…

Ok time to go… “Huarghhhhhhhhhh”-yawn…

*post*

Tepak Bridal Photography....

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Chenta Package RM600

• 108 pcs 4R pictures (3 rolls)
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• 180 pcs 4R pictures (5 rolls)
• 2 8R pictures
• 1 sticky album
• 1 8R size frame
• 1 CD containing 182 pictures

Kirana Package RM1600

• 1 Storyboard album (12" x 10" x 22 pages)
• 180 pcs 4R pictures (5 rolls)
• 1 Sticky album 2 8R pictures
• 1 8R size frame
• 1 CD Containing 182 pictures

Tiara Package RM2100

• 1 Storyboard album (12" x 10" x 22 pages)
• 180 pcs 4R pictures (5 rolls)
• 1 Sticky album
• 4 8R pictures
• 1 8R size frame
• 1 A3 size canvas picture with frame
• 1 CD Containing 184 pictures
  
  
  
  
  
  

Currently...

My dear blog;

Currently:

• I feel guilty for eating McDonalds today. Well, I’m on diet actually.
• I do 20 seat ups everyday (I increased to 40 last night)
• I jog twice a week at Bukit Jalil park
• I realize that I’m good in marketing, the job I hate most.
• This weekend destination, Ipoh (wedding photography job)
• I love polka dot, still.

Selamat Hari Raya...

My dear blog;

This year Raya is awsome... dapat cuti 1 week... working with non muslim staff really give me an advantage... hehehe... Listening to Raya song at office really makes me tak sabar nak Raya... but the fact is i'm broke... I have to cut the budget for duit raya... heheh so, some of my cousins will not getting duit raya this year... sorry guys... ok la... last but not least... Selamat Hari Raya to all.. maaf zahir batin atas segala salah dan silap (well I'm not a good girl)... people do make mistake... but I believe there's still some space to forgive and forget for what had happen... *post*

Al-Fatihah...

My dear blog;

Al-Fatihah buat Mohd Azharim Mustajab yang telah pulang ke rahmatullah... semuga roh nya di cucuri rahmat... Amin *post*

I'm hungry...

My dear blog;


“BORING!” is the only word inside my head… its lunch hour… office sunyi sepi…The only sound that I heard is my own stomach… Damn hungry but what to do its fasting month

Robet got conjunctivitis… so he’s not working today… damn jealous… not because he got conjunctivitis (of course!)… But because he can wake up late today… best gile!

All my friends laugh at me when I bought Hari Raya Card… What? What’s wrong with that?... “We have sms and internet system… kad raya kuno lah” they said… I just smile… because I have my own point…

Oh yah… I’m invited to sunset party tomorrow at Kompleks Perlancongan Menara Tinjau… I don’t have any idea where this place is… but who cares janji ada makan makan… heheh I love food… and that’s why I’m getting fatter and fatter… hehehhe

*post*

I met him at hello...

My dear blog;

+

=

Ramadhan...

My dear blog;


Selamat menyambut Ramadhan buat semua umat islam... Puasa jangan tak puasa... hehheee... *post*

If You Fall...

My Dear Blog;

This song is in my head all the time.


Azure Ray :: If You Fall
Let's talk and we'll fill the air with imagery that lasts forever
So this is love that's a lovely thought
You have to care for it to keep it together
If you fall will you get up
You're stuck in a dream will you wake up
And if you fell in love will you hold on to it
And if it's cold will you stay warm
You drift too far will you swim towards the shore
And if you fell in love will you hold on to it
Let's sing and we'll fill the air with melodies that blend together
You speak so sweet with words so delicate
A glass i hope will never shatter
If you fall will you get up
You're stuck in a dream will you wake up
And if you fell in love will you hold on to it
And if it's cold will you stay warm
You drift too far will you swim towards the shore
And if you fell in love will you hold on to it

His Day...

My Dear Blog;

"I met that someone... and all he has to do is smile..."

Happy birthday to Mr. Zuhai Amani Hashim... *muash* *post*

Quizzical...

My Dear Blog;

Love's quizzical... *smile* *post*

Working too hard...

My dear blog;

He thinks I'm 'working too hard'... and I think I should take a rest... or maybe I'm just a substitute, nothing special... not worth for him commit... *post*

Leaving on the jet plane...

My dear blog;


Departure: 11.40am
Destination: Indonesia
Mood: Holiday

*post*

Helda suka mandi berjam jam lamanya....

My dear blog;

I'm at Helda's house waiting for her to go out for dinner... it' s almost one hour and I dun know what she's doing in the toilet.... *ergh*

I'm currently busy with my work and still practicing wake up early in the morning (6am every weekdays)... hehe believe it or not... and I guess I'm doing well so far... *smile*

I heard this rumor saying that I have problem with my girlfriends which is not true... so, keep some of your free time for something good rather than reading me and my gf's journal and asking your friend about the true story... anyway thanks for dropping by and your concern to know about our daily life stories... we really appreciate it...

I have same dreams with the same person almost everyday... I dun know why... and I've been thinking about this person lately... *ergh*

Someone lied to me or maybe not... but it's look like one... and it's really pissed me off... I dun want to know the truth... so here I am with the silent mode.... *post*

Forgive and forget

My dear blog;

Everything seems different now... something happen... something that makes me wake up and open my eyes... the moment I realize what is the true friendship is... we laugh, we cry... we got into trouble but one thing my dear friend... I'll be there for you... we'll get through this together no matter what it is... and our secret is still safe... but I hope one day... one fine day everything will be ok and we can be together like before... we miss u dear... but this is for your own good... I hope u'll be ok and be strong...

Nothing much to say here... life seems ok now... I think to forgive and forget is the best thing right now... and just move with the flow... that's how the life is... problems and broken heart make us grow up... make me wake up and realize what is important and worth to be with... I'm happy with my friends and especially my love, Robet... Helda and Diera, u guys really teach me how the real friendship is... Diera, I hope you doing fine over there... we'll miss u dear...

Ok, I have my real life back... I'm working with CSA now and they put me under ASTRO project... I hope i'm doing ok there *pray*.... I'm the only malay in the team... and I don't have problem with that... I'm proud and glad to be a part of the team... so all the best to me~! *post*

When my life change...

Dear My blog;

Being jobless for one month really makes my life up side down. I feel so unproductive hahaha. I can’t imagine how’s my life will be if I still jobless for next coming 3 months. But I guess I need rest for 1 month first before I start my new life with the new job.

I played footsal last Friday (believe it or not, but I guess I fall in love with it) and I start to cook my own meal (since I have plenty of time with myself). I hope it’s only for one month. Please I need my real life back. I’m workaholic (am I?) … I just can’t stay at home doing ‘housewife’ routine thing… watch drama swasta and AF… I guess my life slowly change into that right now… Erghhhhh!!! NOOO!!! Please bring back my busy life… stay at home doing nothing is not healthy for me… Pity to Robet for paying the sundry goods for me… I owe u one dear… Don’t worry, I already sent tons of resume and attended lots of interviews and now I just wait for the feedback call… wish me luck! *post*

Tiramisu anyone?!

My dear blog;

I'm waiting for an important call... Gosh! I'm nervous... It's scary... It's really an adrenalin-boosting event!... I really need a slice of tiramisu... *post*

At last...

My dear blog;

At last I quit my job with Digi... *post*

wonderwall...

My dear blog;

"and after all... you are my wonderwall..."

-oasis-

My life...

My dear blog;

My life is my only love.... *post*

If i...

My dear blog;

If I have license to kill... u are the first one to be my victim... *post*

Back from holidays...

My dear blog;

Ok i'm back... after the 'holidays' ... yup! I had a great time... ergh... I love beach... took some pictures but damn lazy to edit it *actualy i have such a lame PC* ... but i'm still trying to edit all the pictures... just click at My Deviantart link at the right hand side of this blog... after the strugle with the PC... I managed to edit ONE! hahahha... *at least, one is better that nothing*... I really have a great time.. meeting new friends *kudos to Rhona, Izhar and Shafiz-sorrie if I spell the name wrongly*... they are such nice people... the experience when a stranger knocked our chalet door *damn I scared that time*... hahaha thanks to Helda and Diera for the 'superb holiday' together... Yup! we had fun right?... Er... 'Phuket' rules aight? *LOL*.... *post*

*Not forgoten, kudos to Kong and Sharil... our bodyguard hehehe

The L...

My dear blog;

I ------- hate liars!!!... *post*

It's raining... *wink*

My dear blog;

It's raining outside... heavy rain... erghhh I wish I at home now... but too bad i'm still in the office, i'll be going back at 1am... received an sms from someone... he off to bed now... ergh.. damn envy him... I want my bed!!! *scream* I hope no flood outside there... *pray*.... ok now I'm scared... the rain really make me scared... please please no flood... I dun want to stuck in this lame office until morning... *pray hard*... *post*

V day...

My dear blog;

Happy Valentines day!!!... thanks for the roses, lollipop and the pink card... hehee... Not forgotten the sweet sms too... Oh yah, thanks for the big love shape pillow... *muash* Really appreciate it... *post*

They day we fly together...

My dear blog;

Background music: Joga-Bjork
Mood: Flying

hahaha... I miss someone... I really am-ed ... *iklan sebentar* Ok... I have a blast birthday celebration... yup! the best birthday ever... at 1.30am... I went to Ampang to meet someone... than I got this 'suprise'... a birthday cake with candle with a 'lovely' birthday song... then a typical 'blow the candle' ceremony... ahhahaa *laugh* then I got this cute teddy bear... *smile* this is the first time someone treat me so nice on my birthday and I really appreciate it... *hugs*

Then on the 9th itself... me and my gfs went to Genting Highlands... oh yah! we enjoyed ourselves so damn much!... Guys, u really make my day... We had fun right?... *muash* I know one day we will be separated... but I hope we won't forget the day we met and the day we had fun together... love u guys so damn much! *post*

*Credits to Helda for the picture's stock.

Fix my blog please...

My dear blog;

So here I am back to work after 2 days off... ergh... I really dun have the mood to work plus I guess I'm still sleeping now... *ZZzzz* ergh... working on Saturday really makes me feel like i'm in the twilight zone... I wish i'm out there hang out with my friends...

I dun know what happen to my blog... it seems the settings is not right... there's one big gap at the up side of the frame... I've check the coding but still i can't figure out what's wrong with it... herph.. someone please help me... fix my blog... *post*

The clock is ticking...

My dear blog;

"This night has opened my eyes

and I will never sleep again..."

-morrissey-

Tik! tok! tik! tok!.... hehe the clock in ticking... herph.. ergh... sharp at 12am I turn to er... *Shh* hahah I'm not going to reveal my age... yah.. it's my birthday... so happy birthday to me... how am I feel?... erghh... biasa biasa aja deh... *smile* thanks to all for the wish... thanks to Lia for the sharp 12am msg that she sent to me... she's the first person who wish me... *smile* and Zai for the second one... you guys are superb!.. *post*

Starts witout me...

My dear blog;

"Be not afraid of growing slowly,

Be afraid only if standing still"

Tomorrow is my off day... yipiee!!... *jumping around* I'm going back to my hometown (batu Pahat) tomorrow...Remember that I wrote about what I did with my bonus?... heheh *jeng jeng jeng* Just wait ok...so I'm not going to blog for two days...

When I wake up this morning I feel like I'm loosing something... *sigh*... when I wake up this morning I hope what had happen is only a dream ... but it's not... now, I'm letting you go.. I hope you're happy with your new life... *post*

"If you start without me say my name as you begin

It’s not like it wasn’t all for you

But like everything i do it’s misunderstood

Take a message i’m on my way out of town..."

My Myspace acc...

My dear blog;

My deleted my myspace acc... the reason?... I dun know... bored? maybe... maybe because I'm mad and I want to run away from him... I'm not suppose to run right?... but I have to... I dun know why... I'm confused... I dun know to whom should I believe now... differ people differ story... I dun know... all mixed up... *sigh*

I guess I'm ok now... I dun know... I have to be 'ok'... I have no choice...*sigh*... More explanation on this really make me confused... it's something like there's pulling string situation... so I choose to leave... because I really want him to be happy...

I really love something with polka dots... I got this shoes for Rm20.. cheap rite?... hehe I guess.. because this type of shoes normally cost for Rm30 above... ahhh~~ I really cheap stuff... *pots*

Hot Mocca!...

My dear blog;

This is my lazy week, or maybe lazy month... I dun have the mood to do anything... even eat... er... wait... I have plenty of mood for eating...*kidding* hehehe... I wish I can lay down on my bed doing nuthing... and by the end of the month I still get my salary *eh?* hahaha I WISH!... Being alone all this week really make me unproductive...

I watched Zanthura alone last night... the movie impact was so-so... but the lilboy is cute...




I miss Robet already... he's at his hometown now (Ipoh) for chinese new year holiday... I know this is really not me... to write about my bf... but I don't know... with him I feel different... I know there will be some of my friend or maybe enemy will feel 'yucky' about this... but hey it's my life, my journal... I have the right to write whatever that I want... i dun want to act 'macho', pretend that i don't bother about relationship... I may be differ from you and I can't be you...

I watched Mocca last week, I know this is quite late to write about them... hehehee me with my lazy brain... Arena/Arina (don't know how to spell the name), she's amazing, adorable, cute, lovely... oh dear... she's superb!... I love her!... her voice, the way she talk... grrrrr... hahahha plus I love Mocca so much... and I miss listening to their song since Robet stuck the cassete in my player (until now it's still stuck in there)... *grrr*... But it's ok... I bought the new cd already... My Diaries... hehhe such a sweet voice... such a sweet melody... love them big time!...

I love the traffic now... hahah it's public holiday... so no jammed... *yipie*... I like to drive during this days... so tomorrow is the last day for the leisure in driving... the crowd will be back in Wednesday... what a lame...

I think I getting 'fatter' and 'fatter' everyday... hahaha... my office mate keep saying this word to me... my hips getting bigger and bigger... erghh... I can't fit my old jeans anymore... *geee*... if previous days I really want to gain my weight but today, hell no!... please stop growing Fara... please... but my mom like it... she's keep saying to my sis in law that I'm 'happy' now that's whyI gain my weight... *duh!*

I mentioned before that I got invitation from Nat to join her for Japan trip right? too bad I have to cancel... so no Japan... it's ok maybe next time...I did used all the money for something else... wanna know what is that 'something'?... hehehe secret! later, when everything is confirm I'll post another journal about 'it'... *post*

I wish I can kill myself...

My dear blog;

Today is disaster.... network failure!!!... Argh... I wish I'm vanish from this world... plus it's Chinese New Year... customer really want to use the line ... pity them... but what can I do... erghh!

Zai made this for me... she hopes this thing can cheer me up!.. ergh I wish!... but thanks Zai, it's so nice of you... it did cheer me up (for a few second) hahhaa... oh dear... when this network thingy will be resolves... *post*

The J town...

My dear blog;

I returned my mom's car last Thursday... I drove to Johore alone at 12pm and took the bus back to KL at 6.30pm... what a hectic day... so now I got my Nicky back... but he's not like before... his bumper is in black colour and the whole body is in gold... can you imagine how not handsome he is???.... *erghhh*

I can't wait for my salary day... i'm in an alert mode now... I have to pretend there's no Mcd next to my apartment... I have to close my eyes when I passed Sushi King... I have to budget... I really want to eat sushi badly... ergh.. I really really want it... yup! 27th is my off day... and Sushi King is the first place i'll go... *grins*


I have lots of plan for my bonus... it's 4 months salary... *yipie* What can u do with 4 months salary? *gulp* hahaha now I'm scared... suddenly Nat called me... herph.. guess what.. a trip to Japan.. *wink wink* Can you think what I'm thinking?... OMG... is it for real? I dunno... I have to grab my calculator and start to calculate my budget back... but I can't promise her... the answer maybe yes or no... but I hope for yes!... Nat, just hang on there... I'll let you know the result as soon as possible... *pray* Whoahhh!! if this is real... er.. er.. I dunno know what to say... I'm totally speechless... please gimme the right word to say *post*

Clueless...

My dear blog;

When shit happen and you're totally clueless what to do, what will u do? u just want to sit down by your own selve? or u want to look around to find some help?... I prefer to solve it my by myself since I don't want to make things complicated among me and other people... but I'm glad that I have Azah and Bard... they come without me to find them... I feel like screaming out loud... I understand if other people not understand... because the problem is mine not them... so who am I to force them to understand?... even my dad have change.. everything's not like before... am i feel free to tell my friends?... what will I get as response?... I don't know... and i don't even want to try... so I choose to sit silently... u know where to find me when u need me... *post*

The 'A'!!! The what??!!

My dear blog;

Accident!!!... I hate when this happen... I dun have the mood to write today... what can I say is... how to find the money to fix everything.. I wish I have a rich dad so that he can pay everything... erghhhhhh!!!! *post*

Nervous he is.....

My dear blog;

First of all I wanna wish all the Muslim 'Selamat Hari Raya Korban'... I have splendid celebration... my parents come over to my place... they brought me the food all the way from Johore... ketupat, sambal goreng, rendang, nasi tomato, ayam masak merah ect ect... *yummy!* I really miss my mom's cook and I really enjoyed the meal... but the best part is, this is the first time my parents meet Robet... hahahha... I can see his nervous face and he claim that he keeps going to the toilet before he went to my house... hahhahah.. it's so funny when he tried to act 'cool' and 'polite'.. out of sudden everything that came out from his mouth is in proper word... he came with the blue shirt that I bought for him... I love to see him in that shirt-ed... I wish I can take his picture with that nervous face... but I can't because I'm nervous too.... hahahha...

The best part is... my parents.... erghhh... at last!!!... they approve 'this one'... well, i'm the only daughter so for them to accept a 'guy' in my life is difficult... but as for Robet, he passed... *smile* My dad, he likes Robet character... my mom, she likes him because he tied his hair nicely... *phew!!!* I like guy with long hair but my mom don't... I'm glad she's ok with Robet's hair... *phew!!* I can feel the cockroach roaming inside my stomach and I dun know how to act but I bet Robet felt the same... This is the first time my dad sit down with me and talk about the 'guy' in my life... yeay! I'm not my daddy's lil girl anymore... I'm big girl now...

I pray hard... I hope everything will go as plan... I pray hard... hoping that tomorrow will be mine... *post*

Anger...

My dear blog;

I am mad... I really am... and I mean it... Dun ever break the promise or i'll change to an evil monster... *post*

'Vacation'... is what I need....

My dear blog;

I'm sick with the media and cops... I dun have the intend to watch any news or buy any newspaper anymore... there is no trust anymore... they like to point finger at the youth and I really feel sick of it... ohkehhhhh... I dun want to talk about it anymore... my hatred towards them are to the max...

I feel damn bored with my job now... inside my head there's no other word than 'QUIT'... but I just can't ... ergh... please please please I need some colours... right in front of me it's just black and white... and I really wanna puke...

I had headache almost everynight... It's comes right from my eyes towards to the back of my head... I dun know why... and I really wanna scream out loud... maybe it's because of my glasses... or maybe because of the aircond at my office.. it's damn cold.. and I shiver like hell... eventhough I'm wearing my hoody I still can feel the cold... the aircond comes straight to my head... I wish I can smash my head with hammer... *wish*

I watched The Wig yesterday... and it's damn scary... ergh.. there's lots of part that I dun have the guts to watch... I close my eyes with my hands and let the little tiny space between my fingers open for me to see the screen... and the funny part is there was a big size chinese guy who scream out loud like a girl... he just sat behind us... and he made the whole teather laugh...

Raya Haji just around the corner and I just have one day off which is on the 10th itself... my dad called me and ask... I dun know what to say since my off day only one day... I dun think so that i'll be going back to BP but I dun have the guts to say no... later I'll call him and explain... I hope he'll understand (that's why I hate my job now)

Azhar came to my cubicle and we had a small chat about vacation to an island... huh! I really need a vacation now... and island is a must... I can't wait for my bonus... so that I can plan my vacation.. If I dun have anyone to follow i'll be going alone... I don't care... I dun want to go to any city anymore... I really need something can cure my headache.. ergh!!... I can feel the pain... and I really need to off now... *post*